Everything is Negotiable
How to Get the Best Deal Every Time
by Gavin Kennedy
“In ‘Everything is Negotiable’, Gavin Kennedy shows us that negotiation is not just a skill, but an art form. With decades of experience and practical insight, he offers a comprehensive guide to mastering this essential business skill. I highly recommend this book to anyone looking to improve their negotiation abilities.”
The Unwritten Rules of the Deal: A Practical Guide to Winning Any Negotiation
Many of us dread negotiation. We picture a high-stakes, confrontational battle of wills where one person's gain is another's loss. We feel anxious, underprepared, and often walk away feeling like we left something on the table. But what if negotiation wasn't a mysterious art form reserved for the naturally gifted? What if it was a simple, learnable skill, like driving a car or cooking a meal, that anyone could master with the right framework?
In his classic and refreshingly practical guide, Everything is Negotiable, Gavin Kennedy demystifies the entire process. He argues that negotiation is not about clever tricks or aggressive tactics, but about a disciplined process of trading what you have for what you want. The book provides a robust, step-by-step playbook that can give anyone the structure and confidence to get a better deal every time, whether you're negotiating a multi-million dollar contract or just deciding with your spouse where to go for dinner.
What You'll Learn
The three types of negotiators, and the one you must become to be effective.
A four-phase process that brings structure and confidence to any negotiation.
The single most important rule for making concessions (and how to avoid giving away value for free).
Why meticulous preparation is the true secret to negotiation success.
Simple but powerful phrases you can use to handle tough tactics and get a better deal.
What Kind of Negotiator Are You? The Red, Blue, and Purple Styles
Kennedy begins by identifying three distinct negotiation styles. Understanding them is the first step to becoming more effective.
The Red Negotiator: This is the aggressive, "I win, you lose" negotiator. They see every deal as a battle to be won. They use pressure tactics, make extreme demands, and care little for the relationship. While they might win in the short term, their scorched-earth approach often poisons long-term partnerships.
The Blue Negotiator: This is the cooperative, "win-win" negotiator. They are focused on being fair, building trust, and creating a harmonious outcome. They are quick to make concessions to preserve the relationship. The problem? When a Blue negotiator meets a Red one, the Blue almost always gets taken advantage of.
The Purple Negotiator: This is the ideal. A Purple negotiator is a strategic, principled, and assertive professional. They aim for a win-win, "Blue" outcome, but they are fully prepared to handle the hardball tactics of a "Red" negotiator without becoming one themselves. They are "conditionally cooperative." They don't give anything away for free and are masters of trading, always seeking a workable deal that stands the test of time.
A friend of mine, a classic "Blue," was trying to land a new client. The client, a "Red," kept demanding lower prices and more free services. My friend was about to cave in when he switched to a "Purple" mindset. He calmly said, "I can see why those things are important to you. I am happy to discuss a lower price, but we'd need to adjust the scope of services accordingly. Which of these features is less critical for you right now?" He stopped making concessions and started proposing trades, transforming the negotiation.
The Four Phases: A Structured Path to Agreement
The heart of Kennedy's system is a simple, four-phase process that brings order to the chaos of negotiation.
Phase 1: Prepare
This is the most important phase, and the one most people neglect. Kennedy argues that most negotiations are won or lost before you ever sit down at the table. Preparation involves more than just knowing what you want. You must understand your priorities, separating your "must-haves" from your "nice-to-haves." You must know your walk-away point—the absolute worst deal you are willing to accept. You also need to do your homework on the other side. What are their likely needs, priorities, and pressures?
Phase 2: Debate
This phase is not about arguing. It's about exploring interests and testing assumptions through the power of questions. In the debate phase, you use open-ended questions to understand what the other side truly values. You can also use this phase to signal your own positions without committing to them. For example, instead of saying, "We need a 10% price increase," you can signal by asking, "How would a change in the current price structure affect your business?" The goal is to gather information and shape the other side's expectations.
Phase 3: Propose
After a thorough debate, you move to the "what if" phase of proposals. A proposal is not a demand; it is a tentative, conditional offer designed to see what might be possible. The language is crucial here. Instead of "I want X," you say, "What if we were to consider X?" or "Supposing we could look at Y?" Proposals are the tools you use to start building a potential deal.
Phase 4: Bargain
This is the final, "if-then" phase where you hammer out the details. The bargaining phase is about trading concessions.Kennedy’s golden rule is simple but non-negotiable: never give a concession without getting one in return. A concession offered for free is a signal of weakness. The proper way to bargain is with conditional language: "If you can agree to X, then I can agree to Y." For example, "If you can pay the full amount within 30 days, then I can include the extended warranty at no extra charge." This is the essence of trading.
The Purple Negotiator's Toolkit: Key Phrases
The language you use can dramatically shift the tone and outcome of a negotiation. Here are a few phrases inspired by Kennedy's approach.
To open the Debate phase: "Help me understand what a successful outcome looks like for you."
To test their flexibility: "How much room for movement do we have on this particular point?"
To make a Proposal: "What if we were to structure the deal this way?" or "Supposing I could meet your delivery deadline, what could you offer in return?"
To start a Bargain: "If you can commit to a two-year contract, then I have the flexibility to offer a discount on the monthly fee."
To handle a 'take it or leave it' ultimatum: "Let's set that issue aside for a moment and focus on the areas where we seem to agree. We can come back to it later."
Your Pre-Negotiation Checklist
Before you enter any negotiation, run through this simple checklist.
1. Define Your Interests: What do you really need from this deal? Make a list and rank your priorities (Must-Have, Important, Nice-to-Have).
2. Know Your Walk-Away Point: What is your absolute bottom line? Having a clear walk-away point is your greatest source of power.
3. Brainstorm Their Interests: What does the other side likely want? What pressures are they under? What do you have that they might value more than you do?
4. Prepare Your Opening Questions: Write down 3-5 open-ended questions to start the "Debate" phase and get them talking.
5. List Your Tradables: Make a list of all the concessions you are willing to trade. Think about things that are low-cost for you to give but might be high-value for them to receive.
Final Reflections
Everything is Negotiable is an enduring classic because it strips away the fear and complexity from one of life's most essential skills. Gavin Kennedy provides a robust, process-driven framework that empowers anyone to negotiate more effectively. The book teaches us that negotiation is not a battle of wills to be won, but a structured process of trading. By preparing diligently, debating intelligently, proposing creatively, and bargaining conditionally, you can move from being a passive participant to a confident architect of better deals and more durable agreements.
Business Floss is reader-supported. When you use our links we may earn an affiliate commission that helps us keep the site running. Thank you for your support!
